ENGLAND ‘BOUGHT’ AS A GIANT THEME PARK

Like Queen Victoria, King Charles is "not amused"

In its most audacious move yet, media, entertainment and telecoms giant Doogle has ‘bought’ England to operate it as a giant tourist resort.

This crowns Doogle’s empire-building, which has seen it bailing out cash-strapped areas of Europe, including Tuscany in Italy, Germany’s Rhine Castle district and the Spanish holiday coast, in exchange for managing them as part of its burgeoning tourist business.

Doogle – the world’s biggest company, incorporating Google, Disney, China Telecoms and India’s Reliance – was launched in 2015 after yet another global financial crisis, which wiped out anti-trust opposition to its formation. Its turnover today is nearly US$ 5 trillion – making it one of the largest ‘economies’ in the world, bigger than the UK and most European countries.

Doogle’s new deal with the weakened British Government coalition is that it will underwrite the country’s growing deficit in exchange for ‘managing’ parts of England as a tourism venue. Popular institutions such as the Royal Family, and much of England’s pageantry and history, will be commercialized and put on display for the growing tourist and shopping hordes from Asia and Latin America.

HRH King Charles is not amused to be performing inspections of the guards outside Buckingham Palace purely for Doogle tourists; but he is helpless as the country’s coffers empty.

This is one more step in the ongoing decline of Europe, which has become a pure service economy. Its last major industrial business, Volkswagen, was shut down in 2016. Spiraling health and social security demands from its aging population, and waves of immigrants, including climate change refugees, have stretched EU budgets to breaking point.

Attempts by the UK and Germany to become world financial centers faltered as Asia swept past to become the global economic powerhouse.

“But Europe and England are rich in colorful tradition and make the perfect vacation venue – particularly now that the weather there is more sunny,” says Doogle CEO Ivan Nepali.

“Anyway, ask the people – do they want jobs or empty stores? Even if they have to work in ‘Disneyland’ costumes!”

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